Idle Ramblings of a Slightly Mad Man

I travel for work across the country.  I have enjoyed the hospitality of many great towns and cities.  I’ve been to Seattle, Chicago, Boston, NYC, Portland Maine, West Palm Beach Fla, Richmond Va and Salt Lake City just to name a few.

I have stayed in many hotels and ate at many restaurants.  While I always try to enjoy the local cuisine and if I can stay in the unique hotels, there are times where I do visit or have to visit the national chains.

What I have found, in my opinion, is that of all the hotels out there, consistently, Hilton and Holiday Inn’s tend to be the best.  I have had the best sleep, accommodations, food and experiences in these two chains.  I’ve stayed in Marriotts, Raddisons and others, and I have stayed in some very good ones, but they are not consistent across the country. 

As far as restaurants, of the national chains, Applebees and Chili’s have been the best.  Again, they have been consistent and their selections are broad.  I find that their food is tasty and flavorful.

Some of the other national chains lately have been messing with their menus, like TGIFriday’s and Ruby Tuesday’s.  They have cut down on their choices and reduced their menu.  I have been very disappointed with them lately.  I can understand why they have cut back on their menu, what with the food prices increasing and all.

That being said, I recently went to breakfast at a diner just outside of Brooklyn NY and ordered a Spanish Omelet.  What I like about a Spanish Omelet is that it is made, at least in all the other breakfast establishments I have dined in, with a  mix of cheese, peppers, onions and salsa and then I love to pour Tabasco Sauce all over the top of the omelet.  So good.

So back to this diner outside of Brooklyn.  I placed my order of a Spanish Omelete and opened my newspaper and read for a short while, waiting patiently for my breakfast to arrive.   

After a short while, my waitress returns with my plate and lays it before me.  I look at my plate and notice that there is an egg.  On top of that egg is grilled peppers, grilled onions and ……………………. wait for it………………  grilled celery.

My waitress turns to leave and I stop her.

Me:  Um…… excuse me.  I ordered a Spanish Omelet.

Her:  That’s it hon.

Me:  It is?

Her:  Yeah.

Me: (looking at it for a moment before turning to the waitress and saying)  From what part of Spain?

I am finally home from my tour of NYC and Long Island.  It had been an interesting week for me with work.  I had been stationed out in the Hampton’s.  During the day I was working hard and in the evening I was able to explore and enjoy all that the Hampton’s has to offer.  Unfortunately, this time of year, that is not much.  It seems that everything all closes at 7PM.  That is what happens when you go to a resort during the off season.

What I have seen does not really impress me.  It has not been a Weekend At Bernie’s.  Traffic is all jammed up and only moves at a maximum of 30 MPH.  I assume that is only in the middle of the night because during the day there are cars all over the road by none of them are moving faster.

What really surprises me is that for all the money this area is supposed to have, there is no cell phone signal that my cell phone can connect to.  Verizon needs to come to the Hampton’s because no one “can hear me now”!

Where I have been staying is a little Bed and Breakfast and I will be the first to admit that while they are quaint, I feel very uncomfortable.  There is something about staying in someone’s house that just does not allow me to relax and unwind.  I never make my bed at home and yet I find myself obligated to make it at the B&B.  Where normally I might watch HBO late on a Thursday night, I am embarrassed to even put the TV on at all.

Then there is the community shower in the B&B.  I find it odd having to share the shower with other guests.  In my hotel, I like to strip and walk to the shower in my room.  In that bathroom I can lay out my toothpaste, hairbrush, shaving needs, etc…  But in the B&B I am carrying all of my items to the bathroom along with my towels and clothes to change into. 

Maybe it is just me and my oddities. 

I do know that after being away for the past three weeks I was ready to get home.  I had not seen the kids and I had not seen the wife.  I am missing cheese steaks and Philly sports.  Flyers are in the playoffs, The Phillies are leading the East and the Soul is playing their best season and yet with all that good fortune going on, I am missing it all. 

Finally, May is National Masturbation Month and I am stuck in a B&B where I am embarrassed to take a shit because someone else might smell it let alone to rub one out and have someone hear it.  That being said, have a very Happy May!

Find a Penny, pick it up, and all day long, you’ll have good luck!

That’s me.  If there is money lying on the ground I am picking it up but not because I am expecting any additional good luck nor do I care if it is on heads or tails.  I’ll pick it up.  I am not superstitious. 

I have always been that way.  It is not like I am poor and need the money but I will pick it up and place it in my pocket and at the end of the day I have a coin jug that I will put my change in. 

The coin jug is kept in my bedroom but is shared by myself and the kids.  What we do is fill the jug with change or dollars to be converted and used for our big summer vacation. 

Right before vacation we will take the coins to the bank and convert them to dollars to be used how ever we want.  Maybe it is a fancy dinner, maybe it is a special souvenir, maybe for a night at the boardwalk to ride the rides and play some games. 

This year my son has been really keeping his eyes to the ground and he has been finding a lot of change.  When I asked him what he was planning on using his vacation money for he stated that he wanted a Tshirt.  Just hearing that he has plans makes me happy.  He is learning that he needs to save to get something he wants. 

As soon as our vacation is over, the kids and I will start the coin jug up even before we have decided what the next vacation destination will be.  We’ll keep our eyes to the ground picking up the money we find. 

The way I see it, the folks that dropped the money is just helping to pay for our vacation.

Thanks folks, and keep dropping that change!

I have a new hobby.  It is something that I do when I travel that always amuses me.  To many, it will seem odd and dumb but I laugh everytime I do it. 

When I stay in hotels, I will set the alarm clock at 3 AM on the morning I check out so that the very next morning the alarm will go off, hopefully on an unsuspecting newcomer to the room.   

I laugh every time I do this.  I know, I know.  Very childish right?  But I get great enjoyment thinking about the next person that sleeps in that room and suddenly gets the sudden jolt to their deep sleep as the alarm goes off.

Or better yet, the room remains empty but there are people in the next room that has to hear it go off all night long. 

I don’t know why but it really cracks me up.

When the Superman movie came out with Christopher Reeve, the greatest accolade, the greatest comment, bestowed upon it was that the movie made you believe that a man could fly. 

There has not been another movie like that since. 

Until today.

I saw Iron Man tonight and I was blown away!  This movie made me believe that man could fly again.  I was in awe throughout the movie.  This is the best comic book movie based on a Marvel character in a long time. 

I would also reccommend that you sit through all the credits at the end!  You’ll be glad you did.

The scene is a Supermarket, the non foods aisle.  Specifically, Aisle 2 - hairspray, shampoo, hair dyes, hair clips, hair ties hair nets and brushes and combs.  Everything one might need for hair it’s there. 

My wife and I are in that aisle, and as we casually walk the aisle, my wife and I are conversing about nothing.  Literally nothing.  I whimsically make a comment that I can’t believe that Aquanet still exists and I tell her the same old story about when I was in High School, had the long rocker hair that would be teased up like I was member of some 80’s hairband and how my friends and I in the band would douse our hair with Aquanet and rock out.  If only Liquid Life took off and rocked the world.

She is only half paying attention to me as I am pushing the cart and she is walking in front of it scanning the price tags for the sale prices and checking if we have coupons to match.  This is the hell my life has become.

We stop at the end of the aisle, in front of the hair clips, hair ties, fake hanging hair attached to clips, brushes and combs and the following conversation occurs totally out of the blue.

Wife:  You need a new brush!

Me:  I need a new brush?

Wife:  Yes.

Me:  Why?

Wife:  Yours is out dated.

Me:  It’s what?!?!

Wife:  It’s out dated.

Me:  It’s out dated.

Wife:  Yes.  You’ve had it since high school probably.

Me:  Ok.  Let’s assume that you are correct for a moment and that I have had that brush since high school.  How can a brush be out dated?

Wife:  Have you seen your brush?

Me:  Ummm…. yes.  And it looks just like that one (pointing to a similar one on the shelf).  It fully serves its function without fail.  It brushes my hair.  It’s functional and operational.   I did not realize that brushes have expiration dates.  I did not know that they go out of style.  I did not know that my brush was a fashion statement.  I didn’t know that I was no longer hip because I have held onto a brush longer than I have held onto my Members Only jacket.  You should be thankful that I no longer carry my comb in my back pocket.  Carrying combs in the back pocket - that is out dated.  My brush, I’m thinking not so much.

Wife:  Now you’re just being an idiot.

Me:  Me?!?!

Wife:  Never mind.  Keep using that old stupid brush of yours. 

Me:  Ummm….  I was planning on it.

Wife:  Good!

Me:  Good.  Besides, it wasn’t on sale and we didn’t have a coupon for it.

I have completed my Best Of series last week and I have to say that it seemed to have gone well.  I was really impressed by the comments.  I was also pleased by some of the requests for some past posts.  It was interesting to see what a few of you thought were your favorites.  Thanks for the input.

Maybe the same time next year I will do it again, if I remember. 

This stupid blog is 1 year old and I just passed the 10,000 views mark.  Two big milestones at the same time. 

I never figured that I would continue with this blog past a few months, let alone for a year.  It was supposed to be an experiment.  I have found that I enjoy the experience and some of the bonds I have made with a few of my readers.  I have found that I have enjoyed the outlet because it allows me to vent, ramble, journal and it serves as a reminder to me of events that I might otherwise forget. 

I’ll continue through with this silly little blog.  I’ll experiment here and there with different things, like I did with the Best Of.  Some will work, some won’t but I’ll continue to write and entertain myself and maybe a few others while I am at it.

Thanks for being here.

I was tagged by Teeni and the Vaguetarian Tea Room for this meme and basically the rule is that I have to write a short little something about books, television and music.  Seems simple enough.

BOOKS - I read them.  I read a lot of different things but when I get a chance to read a good novel I really get into it.  I have been a reader for as long as I can remember.  I would stay up late as a child reading The Hardy Boys.  I would stay up and read as much of the book as I could because I was so captivated by the story and my parents would yell to me to turn lights off forcing me to sneak the lamp under the covers or into my closet to continue my reading.  Thankfully, my passion for reading has been passed to my daughter.

Television -I watch it.  There are just so many good shows on lately that I can’t seem to stay on top of it all.  My DVR is filling faster than I can watch.  The Discovery Channel and the SciFi channel have been exceptional with shows lately.  I think that the writers strike has hurt the Big 4 (ABC, NBC, CBS, FOX) and viewers have discovered a whole new world of television beyond them.

Music -  I listen to it.  I am not a fan at all of any of the current music that is out there.  Especially the mainstream music.  There is nothing good being produced or written.  It seems like everyone is trying to write that next one great hit. 

Gone are the days where you would buy an album (or CD for you youngsters).  Now people just want the singles.  They want one song.  That one song that will be a hit.  They want the one song that the music industry and the record company want you to listen to.  There are sometimes some great songs that are on albums beyond just what you’ve been spoonfed. 

I grew up on Kiss, James Taylor, Carol King, Led Zepplin, Warren Zevon and many more.  Every song on the album would be a great song.  Every song you would know the words to.  Today, the only albumCD, that anyone would know the words to would be the Now That’s What I Call Music, vol 384. 

The thing that the three of these forms of entertainment have in common is that they allow you an escape from reality, relax the mind, escape into another world, someone else’s world, and be led on a journey or an experience that you would not otherwise take.

Beam me up Scotty, put on some Dark Side of the Moon and let me try to break the Da Vinci Code. 

As for who I will pick to play along, and there is no pressure, it is strictly voluntary….

Eric

Kara

Heddy

and anyone else that would like to dabble in it. 

When I die, I want to be recycled.  In this age of green living, I want to do everything and anything I can to help save the planet.  Starting with my body.

I want my organs harvested and used.  I want to donate my organs to help others.  Any organ that cannot be transplanted to another body I want to donate to schools and universities to study and use in classroom learning.

I want my blood and fluids to be used and recycled too.  I don’t know if you can recycle blood, bile or urine but it is something that should be looked into.  Who knows what uses we could find for it.  Who knows, bile may be the next fuel source for cars.  Or milking my mucus for lubricants. 

I want my bones to be used for glue, or turned into fertilizer, or buttons for clothes or even used for a dogs chew toy. 

And my flesh, I would like my flesh to be cut from my bones and used to feed the homeless or used for dog food or something like that. 

I don’t think any part of me should be wasted.  I’ll be dead, so what do I care happens to my body.  But if we are going to recycle, let’s get serious!

I have moved on to the next thing to grow in my Aerogarden.  I pulled out the lettuce and cleaned out the machine/growing center/doohickey/thingamabob.  I had read, online, many other reviews that mentioned how difficult and/or time consuming it was to clean out all the roots in the basin but I was pleasantly pleased to find that I had no such issues. 

I was prepared for the task to be arduous and time consuming and found that in seconds, my Aeorgarden was cleaned out of the old and ready for the new.  All told, the turn around time was about 5 minutes. 

I stopped growing the lettuce.  Not because its life cycle was over, no, my lettuce was still very healthy and very much bountiful.  My family and I had many great salads with that lettuce since Christmas.  But I was bored with the lettuce and eager to move on and try something else. 

I began the Herbs.  They have begun to grow quite well.  There is, though, a slight problem with the Aerogarden and the growing of the herbs.  It is not a problem that complaining to Aerogarden is going to do any good.  Aerogarden will not be able to help.  The problem is cats.  Specifically, my cats.  Suddenly, my two cats have a strong appetite for fresh herbs. 

One day, I was watching TV when the one cat hopped up on my lap and began licking my face and I caught a strong scent of onion from her.  It was very unusual and peculiar.  I did not put two and two together until I saw her nibbling on my herbs in my Aerogarden. 

I now have to keep one eye on the Aerogarden to watch for pesky cats until the makers of the Aerogarden come out with a cat proof version. 

In looking in the instructions that Aerogarden sends with the herbs, there were a few interesting recipes that I am going to have to try in a few weeks.  They were very simple recipes and could be prepared quickly and something that a family on the go (like mine)  would enjoy.

I’ll  keep you readers posted as I continue to explore the Aerogarden.