Idle Ramblings of a Slightly Mad Man

I have been feeling uninspired to write lately.  I have been feeling unmotivated to write.  I am in a writing slump.  I think that it may be because I have been so busy with work and family that I have not really had that much time to devote to a blog nor have I done anything blog worthy. 

I am hoping that after I get through all this busy stuff that is going on that I will get time to get back and into writing.  I am sure that if given time to think I could come up with something witty, humorous or an observation on life that would lead to some sort of interesting to read rambling but right now I just don’t have it in me. 

Just know that things are going well. 

Is there no airplane etiquette anymore?  I know you are in cramped quarters and personal space is at a premium but when someone has their legs stretched out so far under your seat that they are actually touching my feet, that is where I draw the line.  And so began my 6 hour battle last night on my flight home from Seattle.

I was sitting in the middle seat, which it uncomfortable and tight to begin with.  There is nowhere to spread out nor can you lean too far to the left or to the right.  Most of the time you need to sit straight in the middle.  So here I am, sitting uncomfortably in the middle seat minding my own business when this guy behind me slides his feet under my seat and starts to touch my legs.  This made me slightly uncomfortable so I moved my legs slightly hoping that he would get the subtle hint that my legs were there and he would back off.  That did not work.  There was a time or six when his feet would come all the way under my seat to where I could see his shoes next to mine.  For the next few hours it was a war of his leg touches and my subtle hints. 

At one point, I pulled my legs back so hard and fast into his feet, hoping that he would get the message that he was invading my space but alas, he did not.  I finally had enough and I turned around in my seat and loudly said to him “Listen Larry Craig, I tried to be subtle about this footsie game you insist on playing with me.  I don’t swing that way.  Maybe you can try a bathroom stall when we land.”   With that, I spun back around and returned to my seat.

I could hear him behind me calling me an asshole and he had no idea and that what I had done was uncalled for and I could care less.  I made my point and he had stopped - for about an hour.  Then it started up all over again.  There was about an hour left of the flight and I really did not want to have another verbal exchange with this guy who was now just being spiteful. 

I reached down under the seat in front of me and pulled out my metallic silver Sharpie marker from my laptop bag.  While his feet were sticking out under my seat, I drew on his sneakers little happy faces, squiggle lines, a few choice words, etc…  At this point I figured I had my revenge and resigned myself to putting up with his rudeness until we landed. 

When the plane landed and we were ready to disembark.  Not once did I look at the guy or say another word to him.  I grabbed my bags and like everyone else I made my way into the terminal.  It was not until we were out of the jetway before I heard him exclaim “What the ****!”  I guess he noticed his sneakers.   By this time I had blended into the crowd. 

 With a big smile I made my way out of there and met my family who were picking me up.  When my wife asked me how my flight went I just smiled and answered great.

It is nice to know that this problem is not confined to just my area of the country.  Driving into work this morning I drove behind a woman that was performing a full make over in her car during the morning commute.  What impressed me most was her ability to drive without the use of her hands since they were both occupied with the daunting task of teasing (I thought teased hair went out of style long ago) and brushing her long mane.  This feat was performed while going about 65 MPH too.  Her skill and mastery of driving without hands while performing a make over would make any professional driver envious.  Not once did she swerve or veer out of her lane.  I was tempted, since I was driving a rental car, to pull my vehicle up along side her closely to see what would happen if I was to nearly sideswipe her.  Would she be able to react quickly enough?  I would bet she would no longer need to tease that hair anymore.

That being said, what I have found interesting is that drivers here are more courteous on the road then drivers back east tend to be.  For example, when you are trying to get over a lane and use your signal other drivers will easily let you in.  Back east, someone would have sped up just to make sure you will never be able to get over.  I have been trying hard to be a courteous drive here.  Years of conditioning make it tough to overcome sometimes. Traffic around here is way worse then New York, New Jersey, Philly traffic.  I can’t believe that anyone gets anywhere on time around here.  Folks here are telling me it can regularly take 2 hours to make a 25 mile commute in and around the city.  That is nuts!  I have more of appreciation of my commute now.   Give me Philly traffic any day!     

It has been a while since I wrote about my sister-in-law and her unintentional but comical mangling of thought and language.  I refer to this as Donnaisms.  

The latest occurred today while talking to her.  I am on the west coast and she is on the east coast.  There is a time difference between the two coasts but I did not realize that she did not know how much.  During our conversation she asked me what time it was and I responded that it was three o’clock to which she asked me -  morning or afternoon?

After my sudden burst of laughter in her ear she asked me if that was a silly question.  Of course I told her yes and explained that there was only 3 hours difference not 12. 

You gotta love her.   

I spent another day wandering around Seattle.  This morning I took in the Pike Place Market.  It truly is a unique place.  I have been to many Markets but none compared to this place.  I spent the better part of the morning taking it all in.  The variety of merchants is overwhelming.  Also mixed throughout is the musicians.  They are scattered throughout the market playing piano, guitar, violin, and clarinet to name a few.  Of course the experience is not complete until you witness the fish throwing.  While you are so focused on the guys tossing yard long fish they somehow slyly slip and overthrow into the unsuspecting crowd causing people to scream and/or leap out of the way of what turns out to be just a stuffed hammerhead shark.  I do have to admit that I was on the receiving end of this fish throw prank.  It did surprise me and no I did not scream.  I did catch it and as it was coming at me the thought that cats would be following me all the rest of the day did enter my mind. 

After the Market I traveled across town to Pioneer Square to take the Underground Tour.  This was a very interesting tour of the city below the city.  Long story short, they built the city, had a fire and rebuilt the city over the ruins.    Underground you can find the original entryways into the city buildings.  It was very educational and entertaining.  The tour guides give the history of Seattle and how it grew into the city it is today. 

Some of the other things I have taken in today is the Umbrella Statue and the first Starbucks.  Unfortunately, I will not have much time the rest of the week to play since I have to work so I am fortunate that I had the opportunity today to cram in as much as I can.  

I am tired and I am worn out but I am much better for taking in as much of this beautiful city as I can. 

I took some time today to visit Seattle and my first stop was to the Space Needle.  While the weather was not the greatest to where I could see Mt Raineir, I did have wonderful views from the top.  I was able to look out over the Puget Sound and the city of Seattle at a height of 605 feet.  The one thing that amazed me was the stability of the Needle.  I have been to the top of several tall buildings like the Sears Tower in Chicago and the Empire State Building in NYC and in almost all of them you could feel the building sway.  Today was a pretty windy day and I did not feel any sway whatsoever. 

There is something amazing about being able to see a city from up high.  There is a certain peace that seems to befall the cities when viewing from above.  A person can almost feel godlike as they witness the activities of the people below who go about their daily routines not knowing or realizing that they are being watched over from above. 

After I came down from the Space Needle I took a walk around the area and as I was walking along the water I was directed by a local that the houseboat out on the water was the same one that was in the movie Sleepless in Seattle.  I tried to act interested and appreciative of his pointing out this local fact but in reality I have never watched this chick flick to know if he was telling the truth or pulling my leg.  I guess now I will have to watch the movie to find out the truth. 

Speaking of Sleepless, I woke up at 4:30 am local time since I am not yet used to the time change.  My body thought it was 7:30 am Eastern still.  Even in Seattle, there is not much going on at 4:30 am. 

I love an early morning flight.  I love that I can hop on a plane and be practically be anywhere in the country before lunch. 

What aggravates that hell out of me, and this happens every single time, is that the gate for my flight is always the very last gate in the terminal.  I have to walk 200 yards, 2 full football fields, to get to the gate.  Every fracking time!  I am getting sick and tired of it.  For once I would love to have a flight depart from gate 1.  Or at least be in the 1-8 range. 

The airline gods are messing with me.  I know they are and quite frankly I am getting pissed over it.  I don’t want to have to walk halfway to Seattle to just board the plane that is taking me to Seattle. 

As I am walking past the other 30 gates I notice that many of them are not even occupied this early in the morning.  If they are not being used then why is it I am always having to walk all the way to the end of the terminal?  I have already waited in the 100 yard security line.  And for those that have never been in the Philadelphia terminal, there is not an electronic walkway.  You have to hoof it through there. 

I arrive in Seattle and walk through their airport, which is not too bad, and walk up to the car rental counter to get my car.  They tell me that I have to go to the Preferred Counter.  Where is that?  Walk down to the up escalator, go across the walkway, take the down elevator and you will find the counter there.  So let me get this straight?  If I step off a plane I can rent right where I get my luggage but if I am preferred I have to walk halfway back to Philadelphia?  You got to be kidding me!  This Preferred stuff does not seem very preferential.

Anyway….  this is my rambling for the day.

I recently purchased the new Verizon Gleam.  I like its features and how slim the phone is.  It has great sound and is a great improvement over my old phone.  What I don’t like about the phone is where it has to be charged.  There is this little tiny opening or slot that you have to place  your fingernail into to get to where you insert the charger.  For most people this is not an issue but for me, I am a terrible nail biter.  Yes, it is true.  I have a complusion other than Toilet Paper. 

My nails are down to nearly nothing.  I know it is a bad habit.  There are worse habits to have and no one really makes an issue of it until something like this comes along.  I was at work and needed my phone charged in a bad way and I could not get it open.  I searched all around for something in the office that I could use to get the little charger slot opened.  A letter opener was too big and a box cutter blade was too flimsy.  I finally MacGuyvered a paperclip that helped me get it open.  What a pain in the ass that was.  I don’t know what I am going to do if I lose my paper clip. 

Maybe what I should do is try to let at least one nail grow out as my phone nail.   

I have been extremely busy lately, too busy to regularly post as I had been and for that I apologize to my 4-5 regular readers.  What I intend on doing is to give a short little update as to what I have been doing and why I have not been regularly writing here.

Work has been crazy nuts for me and will continue to be that way for the foreseeable future.  I have several classes to present in Seattle, in NYC, in Philly and possibly one or two in Virginia all before Thanksgiving.  I have been presenting (practicing mostly) in Philly the past week and a half and I fly out to Seattle next week.    

Home life has been hectic too.  This time of year there are hayrides, pumpkin patches and harvest parties every weekend.  During the week there is after school activities and homework that needs to get done meals that need cooked and a yard to rake leaves.  I also help to run 2 online forums.  Talk Delaware  is a great forum that is a general interest forum that also focus’ on Delaware issues.  TalkPa is a new forum that we created for Pennsylvania.  It is also a general interest forum with a focus on Pennsylvania.  This new forum is taking up my evening time as I try to help grow it. 

Somewhere in all of that I have to find a moment or two to blog and I have been lacking in that department.  Hopefully you all will forgive me.  I have not even have had time to visit all my regular reads and again I apologize for that.  Once in Seattle I hope to catch up on my reading. 

Until then…..  have a happy happy

Someone left the bathroom faucet partially on again.  It was dripping a quick drip.  For some reason this annoys me. 

I believe that this is the fault of my father.  He was very crazy about people in our house letting water run or leaving lights on in a room when no one is there.  My father was not a conservationist except when it came to money.  He could really not care less about how the running water effected the environment.  He did care about how much the electric bill or the water bill was going to be at then end of the month. 

If you left the room, even for just a moment, you would get yelled at.  If you left the water running while brushing your teeth, you got yelled at.  He could be in another room, no, another floor in the house and hear the water running or see a light on. 

I learned quickly how not to get yelled at by my father.  I learned quickly not to let the water run or leave lights on.  As a result, I am left with this compulsion when it comes to lighting and running water that has carried over to today to where I yell at my kids for the same things I was yelled at over.  I will even yell at my wife over this issue. 

Where I work, the sink is constantly dripping because someone does not turn the water completely off when they are done washing their hands.  Even though I am not paying for it, I feel the need to turn the water completely off to stop the water from running.  Or if I am walking by an empty room I need to turn off the lights.  One coworker noticed me doing this and made the comment that I must be some sort of tree hugger.  The truth is that I don’t do it because it is the eco-friendly, conservation, Al Gore approved way of life.  I do it because this is something the old man drilled into my head.    

 My dad - reducing his carbon footprint before it became a fad.